Navigation Signal Lost . . . – Day 28

28 Elul 5774
By Karen Warren

I know I’m in the right place, but nothing looks the same. Where am I? I feel lost. I’m not connected.

How can I lead my spirit to where I want it to be?

So much has happened in the past several months. I used to know where I was, when I was going to be there and who I would see. Then the fire . Little did I know the impact that “contained” kitchen fire would have on my life, on my temple.

I sit in someone else’s sanctuary. I pick up a prayer book that is new to me, unfamiliar. It is heavy in my hands. I see some faces I know and hear melodies and prayers that comfort me. But still, where am I? My heart wants to be home.

I turn to the Internet. I read “Echoes of Elul,” “The Art of Return,” “Ten Minutes of Torah.” They do not bring me out of my sorrow. They do not revive my spirit.

I have always thought of Judaism as my roadmap through life. I am lost. I know I will find my way. It might not be the same or look the same. There is a Way. I will search until I find it.